I have a proper phone, nokia indistructable, it receives PHONE calls and I can PHONE using it, even as far as england. A bonus feature is it tells the time and has an alarm clock.
It receives some strange things , messages, but since I can not read Thai, I have no idea what they are.
I cannot text, in fact I don't need to text anyone.

I have computers and use them, am using one now.

If out I do not want to be disrupted by trivia ; I like cloud watching.
If there were to be an emergency I can be called on the PHONE.
I know my times tables and do not often use the calculator function.
I have never used skype, no reason to. Everyone knows I am still Adonis personified (except when drunk and who wants to see that?).
I rarely write on facebook, "nice" to see some pictures, oh so cute.
Do answer e mails, but when i have the peace required and the ambiance (Eno at present) to write in my own space.

So why do I need a smart phone?

That's me in the video.