When is nesting time for sheep?

A very old man was lying comfortably in his bed at home, up early with the realization that THIS would be his “final day” day on earth.
It had truly been a good life.

While preparing himself for his soon impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his his favorite dessert wafting up the stairs.
His long-departed “old country” German wife would often bake an Apfelstrudel to mark special occasions, or just to make him feel special and loved.

Suddenly his thoughts were overwhelmed with the memories of a life filled with wonderful Strudel. A smile grew on his face as the possibility of one final adventure crossed mind.

He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed.
Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he lumbered downstairs.
He staggered down the hallway following that beautiful smell. With labored breath, he leaned
against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen - pausing to soak it all in.
Apfelstrudel..!!
Where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table, were literally dozens of his favorite apple strudel.
Was it heaven?
Or was it one final act of love from the devoted daughter that had been caring for him since his wife of more than sixty years had passed?
For certain his “Kleine Prinzessin”, as he affectionately called her, was assuring that he left this world a happy man..!!
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his elbows propped in a crumpled posture.
His parched lips parted, with the very idea of the wondrous taste of this heavenly dessert seemingly bringing him back to life.

The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to the most beautiful strudel he had ever seen at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his daughter......

"Back off!" she said,
“𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲'𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥.”

How Southeners look upon the rest of the UK and Ireland. Seems to come from

"Terrible Maps
Hilarious Maps for a Ridiculous World
Michael Howe"

Richard Red Skelton (July 18, 1913 – September 17, 1997) was an American entertainer best known for his national radio and television shows between 1937 and 1971, especially as host of the television program The Red Skelton Show.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Skelton

RED SKELTON'S SECRET TO THE PERFECT MARRIAGE

1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.
5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.
7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake."
8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver said, "No, jump in!".
10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was 'Always'.
12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.
13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!".

Can't you just hear him say all of these?
I love it. These were the good old days when humor didn't have to start with a four letter word or political. It was just clean and simple fun. And he always ended his programs with the words, "And May God Bless" with a big smile on his face.

The latest fashion trend to wear when bringing out your wheelie bin